Personality Styles

06.07.10

Day 11: Personality Styles

Over the past 9 years, I have done quite a bit of study on the subject of personality styles and traits. I can remember the first seminar I attended, where this topic was discussed in very applicable and understandable terms, as well. If I recall, I was at a function down in South Bend, Indiana, where Robert Rohm (published psychologist) taught the four personality profiles to a group of 1500 or so people. He first started out by asking the room, “do you consider yourself more outgoing or reserved?” Depending on which you answered, you were to stand at a polar opposite side of the room. Then he subsequently asked “are you more task oriented or people oriented?” Again, the room divided, this time into adjacent quadrants. From standing next to those most like us, he proceeded to teach the different between the D, I, S, and C personality profiles. From this point forward, my awareness of my own strengths/weaknesses, as well as that of others, has helped me better communicate and understand people with a greater level of emotional intelligence.

A brief summary of the DISC styles, from my perspective:

D: Dominant, demanding, controlling, driven to success, “force a square block into a round hole.”, shoots first and doesn’t stop to ask questions. FIRE! Ready! Aim?

I: Inspirational, pied piper, motivational, enthusiastic. Loves to make others laugh and have fun with them. Ready? Okay, no seriously, are YOU ready? Hehehe. Okay, here we go… READY!!?? ☺ Aim… no seriously! AIM the thing. Hahaha!

S: Submissive, supportive. Super loyal and trustworthy. Great CSRs, support staff. Will avoid conflict at all cost. Ready if you are. You want me to aim? Okay, tell me when to fire, and where to fire at. I’m here to help!

C: Cautious, calculative, critical thinker. This person stoically processes information, at times. GREAT poker face. Little emotion, tons of logic. Scientists, mathematicians, lab techs. Ready? Aim. Aim. Aim. Aim. Aim.

Fast Forward.

Here I am, 9 years later. I hang a photocopy of the DISC quadrants outside my office door, with the “D” highlighted boldly. It serves as a daily reminder to me that I must slow down and have patience with people. Okay, to tell the truth, I probably hung it up there more to give a warning flair to those wishing to gain my attention. Perhaps, it is a passive aggressive way of me saying “be short, quick, and to the point. I don’t have time for your ‘fluff.’” (admittedly an abuse of the system.)

The point is, I truly see myself as a HIGH D, especially under pressure and stress. I do not dislike being a D. Quite frankly, it comes very naturally for me, at work.

When the pressure is off, I probably lean more toward an “I.” For instance, when I am at someone ELSE’s party, I tend to have a blast, talking and socializing.

Recently, I asked a panel of my Facebook friends to describe my personality traits in a few word. Here are some of the responses that came in:

Bold, kind, outgoing, friendly to all, extemporaneous (spoken or done without preparation), passionate, spontaneous!!, talkative, the ability to always see the positive in things, a friend, integrity, determined, charismatic, funny.

Very interesting to note that my self perception of being a High D, moderate I may be inverse to those who know me on a social level… To them, it would appear (based on their feedback alone) that I present myself as a higher I, and lower D.

Why?

Perhaps I have learned to tone back my “D?” Perhaps I am most fulfilled when I can be an “I?” Perhaps “D” is not as “natural” as I want it to be? Perhaps a combination of all three? I would note that a few of the responses seemed as though they reflected a common personality trait between the responder and me. Could it be that we tend to see reflections of ourselves in other people, for the good or the bad?

The key to remember here is not all people are wired with the same personality style. Additionally, a person could very easily contain any combination or mixture of these styles woven into their unique makeup.

Each style has a blessing and a curse. From my perspective, here is a quick list of blessings and curses inbred to the for primary personality styles:

D: Blessing- Decisive Curse- steps on toes without thinking about it
I: Blessing- Inspirational Curse- Impulsive
S: Blessing: Supportive Curse- People pleasing
C: Blessing- Critical thinking Curse- (overly) Cautious… to the point of paralysis

It is the responsibility of the emotionally intelligent to recognize and adapt to create a comfortable environment for genuine communication with another person. NOT manipulate, and NOT imitate.