Mancation 2010

08.03.10

Mancation:  Noun.  pronounced "Man-cay-shun" An annual summit where men gather to celebrate their ability to rule the earth. 

A short fable:

Once upon a time, in a far away land… 5 grown-up boys gathered annually to celebrate the anniversary of the first Man-cation. (That’s vacation for a brotherhood of men)

Year One: An unforgettable journey into the deep abyss of the northern sector of Michigan’s Upper Peninsula. No running water, other than the Yellow Dog River which bordered their hand crafted abode. They set Indian Fish Traps, discover the true YUPER definition of “Sauna,” and set fire to… things. They hiked miles into the deep forest, with hatchets and axes in hand… ready to fend off wild black bears, tigers, or lions… OH MY! Of the many memories these men shared, nothing could top the one of their good friend, “Barry,” tackling and uprooting a 3 foot diameter tree trunk right out of the ground. Epic.

Year Two: The men returned to the same sanctuary, but this year discovered the pure joy that come from gas powered toys. Quads ripped and roared down dirt laden paths. With the smell of cutigee beef sausage sizzling over the open flames, these grown men initiated jousting competitions with broom sticks and branches, exchanged jokes and laughter, and talked about recently changed marital status (a few of these renegades had recently hitched up!)

Year Three: Life began to tip the scales. 2 of the 5 had been married off by now. All of them were knee deep in careers. Life was busy busy busy… but… they forged forth and made this year’s Mancation a priority. A compromised was reached in terms of location, and a 2 hour drive brought them to a more local cabin… this time on a beautiful lake. Fish practically jumped out of the water and onto the “cleaning” table, while Bobby Cheeks (the most outspoken of the bunch) used a knife blunter than a pencil eraser to gut and clean a fish for the first time in his life. This was his rite of passage into true masculinity, as he never even baited his own hook, let alone clean his catch. The men sat around burning logs at night, and the Monopoly board during day. An unhealthy addiction to this Parker Brothers board game lead to “offseason withdrawls” that keep these men coming back year after year (Mancation after Mancation) for more. 

Year 4: This year the men rented an even closer yet cabin, on an even more local river. Though the river was incredibly difficult to fish in, these men were not going to allow it to defeat them. So? They formed an alliance with a gentleman up the road, threw river tubes with micro holes into the river, and commenced a 3 mile float back to their cabin. Fresh river tubing. Epic.

Year 5 (current year): 4 of the 5 men are married. 3 of these guys have children. All the men are deeply immersed in their careers. One of the Mohicans has jumped ship and moved to New York City to eat bagels and pick fights on the streets, professionally. But, no matter how far apart their worlds may have drifted, they all still make this year’s Mancation a top priority that cannot be compromised.

And so, the story of this year’s Mancation begins. August 4th, 2010. These men have sourced a cabin, set on a lake, with jet skis, pontoon boats, and built in man-cave/gameroom. “New York” will fly in to join the fun, and all 5 of them will reunite, with a common purpose: to be men.

They will eat flesh that burns over open flame.

They will lour fish with crack-like bait, then spear them with sporks.

They will initiate man-challenges, with placement rewards for Monopoly startup capital. (1st place gets 5X, 2nd gets 2x, etc)

They will hike, with pocket knives at the ready, and take on any wild animal that gives them the “stink eye.”

They are men.

No cell phones.

No email.

No computers.

No rules.

… to be continued.